I am totally supposed to be sleeping because I have a double, but I just got the confirmation call from Kip's office about surgery and now the anxiety is kicking in. Evey endo chick can agree that going from surgery to surgery you still get that worry about will they find something or maybe this is the way my body is supposed to be.
We have been told by dismissive doctors that it's all in our heads and this pain is normal that you become destined to think this way. It is sad to be honest. I know now that those doctors were idiots and shouldn't be practicing medicine, but I know that I have a doctor I do trust. I am about 3 ish weeks away still a long time but, it's crazy to see how my pain and symptoms have gotten worse. I went from having good days where I can function no issue, eat whatever, and spin my little legs off to now being nauseous and shoving food down my throat. I am trying the whole shake thing because this girl needs to eat. We are still short at work so when I do work doubles my body goes into flare mode. I am patiently awaiting the flare to happen and it's hard to explain to male coworkers that I can't 'crush' overtime, because I can barely make it through 8 hours with out getting sick.
That's the one thing though that I handle pretty well, it's pushing myself. I work hard and I don't seek pity from anyone..
that is all
-A
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